So Much More

Can this year be over? And better yet can next year be better? Sure it wasn't all bad. There were great things too but the 'bad' seems to be dragging out through the whole year.  I just sort of looked through my last couple of posts to I am sorry if you read them and I repeat myself. I also apologize if some of what I write isn't clear or doesn't make complete sense. Some of what I will write about involves my children and they deserve some privacy and for me not to share all their details. Also I took am a work in progress. I tend to over share and also not say what I need to say at the same time. I have my own issues right now that I don't know how to deal with, and because I am the way I am everyone else's issues are my first priority. Now... I know the analogy of putting the oxygen mask on yourself first and because I have been told to do that I would. However in my situations that is easier said than done.  In January of this year Miles started having b...

 July 3 was the day of Andrew's cyst surgery. It's been a long month since we have been dealing with this.  Surgery was in Aurora (1½ hours from home). It went well. I don't really know what to say. I am exhausted. I stayed at the hospital last night.  And all I know is they aren't used to dealing with a patient like him. When he was in the hospital last year they were concerned about his walking... then realized he walks with a cane and a shoe lift. When he went in because of urinary problems the were worried about his other toilet functions. This time they are worried about urinary function...  He has had a medical pump with a spasticity medication called baclofen since 2010. Last month he needed it refilled; something he does every 6-7 months. He needed it filled. We made a big deal about it. Now we are finding that everyone doesn't know what it is for and asks dumb questions. 

 So we returned from Disneyland. Of course people say they need a vacation from their vacation.... Hahahahahahaha.  The day of our return trip Andrew started hurting, lots of walking, air travel and the likes are what we first thought. However the pain kept getting worse. Andrew has an internal cyst (in his abdomen) that became so big it was drained at one point somewhat recently.  This cyst was most likely something he had at birth, started causing some back problems in his early 20's however, not know about until his car accident in 2010. Yet even then it had not been a real issue until the last couple of years when for whatever reason it decided to grow faster. Again for whatever reason the cyst decided to cause problems and sent Andrew to the ER 2 days after we got home. The ER didn't really do a lot and 2 days after that he went to a different ER. He had an appointment in Aurora, Colorado at the hospital anyway (not cyst related), so he went there. After being admitt...

 I used to blog all the time. I have a lot of thoughts and sometimes it's easier to get them out if I write and *edit* (ok sometimes I don't edit it).  So as most people that might read this know I am a mom of three boys. My middle child Miles is on the Autism Spectrum and non-speaking. He turned 15 this year... and let me tell you his experience with ASD and puberty has been very tough. I don't even know what it is, hormones probably, but it has been difficult. Without going into too much detail (because that is rude to him), meltdowns and self injuries have been extreme since January of this year. At school, at home and more recently in public.  We recently got back from Disneyland. We were supposed to go in 2020 but that was cancelled due to a worldwide pandemic. I am still trying to recover from a rollercoaster of emotions from our trip.  Day 1 was a travel day. I would say that's pretty typical except it wasn't. We drove to the airport, parked and had to make o...